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Draftling demo for FOSDEM

955173cc Draftling sync: 4 file(s) at 2026-09-24T11:49:16Z · Draftling · 24 Sept 2026, 11:49

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Title: THE IMPORTANCE OF BEING EARNEST
Author: Oscar Wilde
Source: Adapted from the 1895 play
Format: Screenplay

INT. ALGERNON'S DRAWING-ROOM - DAY

ALGERNON (20s), aristocratic and effortlessly charming, plays a chaotic, avant-garde melody on the piano. 

LANE, the butler, enters the room carrying a tray of cucumber sandwiches. He places them meticulously on the table.

Algernon stops playing and turns around.

ALGERNON
Did you hear what I was playing, Lane?

LANE
I didn't think it polite to listen, sir.

ALGERNON
I'm sorry for that, for your sake. I don't play accurately--any one can play accurately--but I play with wonderful expression. As far as the piano is concerned, sentiment is my forte. I keep science for Life.

LANE
Yes, sir.

ALGERNON
And, speaking of the science of Life, have you got the cucumber sandwiches cut for Lady Bracknell?

LANE
Yes, sir. 

Lane hands the silver tray forward. Algernon immediately inspects them, takes two, and begins eating.

ALGERNON
(chewing)
Oh, by the way, Lane, I see from your book that on Thursday night, when Lord Shoreman and Mr. Worthing were dining with me, eight bottles of champagne are entered as having been consumed.

LANE
Yes, sir; eight bottles and a pint.

ALGERNON
Why is it that at a bachelor's establishment the servants invariably drink the champagne? I ask merely for information.

LANE
I attribute it to the superior quality of the wine, sir. I have often observed that in married households the champagne is rarely of a first-rate brand.

ALGERNON
Good heavens! Is marriage so demoralizing as that?

LANE
I believe it is a very pleasant state, sir. I have had very little experience of it myself up to the present. I have only been married once. That was in consequence of a misunderstanding between myself and a young person.

ALGERNON
(amused)
I don't know that I am much interested in your family life, Lane.

LANE
No, sir; it is not a very interesting subject. I never think of it myself.

ALGERNON
Very natural, I am sure. That will do, Lane, thank you.

LANE
Thank you, sir.

Lane bows and exits, leaving Algernon alone with the dwindling pile of sandwiches.


1	Title: THE IMPORTANCE OF BEING EARNEST
2	Author: Oscar Wilde
3	Source: Adapted from the 1895 play
4	Format: Screenplay
5
6	INT. ALGERNON'S DRAWING-ROOM - DAY
7
8	ALGERNON (20s), aristocratic and effortlessly charming, plays a chaotic, avant-garde melody on the piano.
9
10	LANE, the butler, enters the room carrying a tray of cucumber sandwiches. He places them meticulously on the table.
11
12	Algernon stops playing and turns around.
13
14	ALGERNON
15	Did you hear what I was playing, Lane?
16
17	LANE
18	I didn't think it polite to listen, sir.
19
20	ALGERNON
21	I'm sorry for that, for your sake. I don't play accurately--any one can play accurately--but I play with wonderful expression. As far as the piano is concerned, sentiment is my forte. I keep science for Life.
22
23	LANE
24	Yes, sir.
25
26	ALGERNON
27	And, speaking of the science of Life, have you got the cucumber sandwiches cut for Lady Bracknell?
28
29	LANE
30	Yes, sir.
31
32	Lane hands the silver tray forward. Algernon immediately inspects them, takes two, and begins eating.
33
34	ALGERNON
35	(chewing)
36	Oh, by the way, Lane, I see from your book that on Thursday night, when Lord Shoreman and Mr. Worthing were dining with me, eight bottles of champagne are entered as having been consumed.
37
38	LANE
39	Yes, sir; eight bottles and a pint.
40
41	ALGERNON
42	Why is it that at a bachelor's establishment the servants invariably drink the champagne? I ask merely for information.
43
44	LANE
45	I attribute it to the superior quality of the wine, sir. I have often observed that in married households the champagne is rarely of a first-rate brand.
46
47	ALGERNON
48	Good heavens! Is marriage so demoralizing as that?
49
50	LANE
51	I believe it is a very pleasant state, sir. I have had very little experience of it myself up to the present. I have only been married once. That was in consequence of a misunderstanding between myself and a young person.
52
53	ALGERNON
54	(amused)
55	I don't know that I am much interested in your family life, Lane.
56
57	LANE
58	No, sir; it is not a very interesting subject. I never think of it myself.
59
60	ALGERNON
61	Very natural, I am sure. That will do, Lane, thank you.
62
63	LANE
64	Thank you, sir.
65
66	Lane bows and exits, leaving Algernon alone with the dwindling pile of sandwiches.
67